Where Does My Heart Beat Now
by emma-rowling
Summary: Dean and Roman got lost in the shuffle of life and meet each other once again. Nothing has changed, right? Fluff. Ambreigns AU one shot. (Also my contribution to the Dog Days of Summer Fic Writing Challenge on Tumblr).


**I.**

 _ **High School - Senior Year**_

Dean Ambrose licked the blood was trickling down his lips. Fucking delicious. Nothing tasted as good as your own blood.

The man in front of him - a six feet five bald meathead - swung his fist, trying to knock him out but missed as Dean shuffled around in circles.

Someone should have warned the man of how Dean was erratic, how he always threw himself into anything head first without thinking or even caring about the consequences.

His fist jabbed repeatedly at the man's nose going straight for the eyes bringing him to his knees, head hitting hard against the mat.

The referee raised his hand and announced him the victor. Dean pulled it away, disgruntled.

Just another day at his part time job, trying to make ends meet.

As he walked towards the shower room, he could feel the muscles in his body aching. These underground warehouse fights were going to take a toll on him in the long run but fuck him if he ever quitted. They paid him handsomely for it.

It was how he was able to put food on the table for his mother and him.

Kicking his shirts aside, he turned on the shower and washed himself as clean as he could.

Weekend tomorrow. He was already dreading Monday. No telling what stupid assignments their English teacher would assign. Mr Layfield always came up with random topic.

So far senior year was going fine. No group assignments. No participation requested from him. No-

"That was some fight."

Roman.

Roman Joseph Reigns.

His classmate who somehow managed to weasel his way into his life and eventually into his heart.

But Dean was never going to let Roman know about that last part.

At six feet three with piercing grey eyes, long black hair with a manicured beard and moustache and a long sleeve tribal arm tattoo, his friend made all the boys cream in their underpants and all the girls soak their panties.

Roman was also set on a life path that will lead him to great success. Dean was already on the road to self destruction.

They became good friends - outside of the public eye due to Dean's insistence - because of a tutor programme for algebra that the seventeen year old auburn haired teenager had been forced to take.

Roman had been his assigned tutor.

And while he was a good tutor, he was also a caring person who went out of his way to check up on Dean.

Who followed Dean one night - literally trailing him - and discovering the blue eyed teenager's secret life.

Naturally, he disapproved of it but didn't have a say in it. He nagged at Dean whenever he saw the injuries; tended to it too. And even though Dean had tried his best to discourage him, Roman turned up for the fights too.

"Wasn't that much of a challenge," Dean replied. "What are you doing here? Thought you had a family dinner."

"I bailed out," Roman admitted. "You know I never miss your fights."

"You going to keep coming here?"

"Till I'm grey and old. Hopefully that won't be the case."

Dean snorted. Roman always had hopes that he'd stop fighting by eighteen. That was never going to happen either.

"I'll wait for you outside," his friend informed him. "Denny's?"

"Was there any other options?"

Roman smiled.

* * *

Dean always smelled like baby powder after his fights; Roman realised.

As they ate cheeseburgers and shared fries, the Samoan teenager couldn't help but gaze at his friend from beneath his lashes. He prayed for the day Dean would stop fighting, that he would pursue other things in life.

Roman knew that his friend was capable of greater things. He just needed to find something that would stir other passions in him.

"So how's the college application going?" Dean licked his fingers.

"It's going, I guess."

"Still can't believe you want to major in Athletic Training."

"Because I want to be a trainer."

"You could. I mean you're buff and all." Dean coughed. "You'd be able to do almost anything. Like why not model? Faster money."

Roman smiled. "Three reasons. Because there's no satisfaction in it… I mean there's more to me than my physical appearance. Because I want to help people achieve their personal goals. Because I'd hardly see you."

"When you go to college, we won't see each other as much."

"Oh you're coming with me whether you like it or not."

"Make me."

"I intend to."

Dean shook his head. "You can't, Roman. What would people say?"

"Who cares?" Roman argued. "I don't live my life for people. Last time I checked neither did you. So why should we worry about them?"

"I might be chasing away guys who come to pick you up at the front door for dates."

"So? If they run away at the sight of you, maybe they weren't man enough for me." He sighed. "Look, Dean. We can try and hide our friendship during high school but I don't want to do it after graduation. I would be proud to tell the world that this is my best friend, Dean Ambrose."

"What about Chad and Jason?"

"They're my friends too. You'd be friends with them too if you just allow me to-"

"Nope. You know the deal."

"Dean."

"People think I'm weird, Roman. I'm a social outcast. You have a good reputation. You should keep it that way."

"Fuck my reputation then."

But his best friend shook his head. "We've been through this before, Roman. Besides we'll be graduating in six months. It's far too early to worry about life."

* * *

Dean woke up to the sun shining on his face.

His mother was not at home. Probably shacking it up with boyfriend of the week who happened to be a tow truck driver this time. Last week, it was an accountant. And the week before that, a custodian.

Swinging his feet over the bed, he rubbed his eyes. Okay. First a shower and then try to cook something.

"Knock, knock."

Roman.

"Who's there?" Dean played along.

"Orange juice," his best friend answered happily.

"Orange juice who?"

"Orange juice going to talk to me?"

He rolled his eyes as Roman - who always climbed through the window - took a seat beside him with a brown bag. "What's this?" Dean asked.

"Orange juice. With some toast, a blueberry muffin and scrambled eggs."

"How did you know-"

"After I sent you home last night, I saw your mum while I was on my way back walking with a dude. So you know…"

Yeah, he did know. Roman was the only one who knew Dean's home life inside out. "Thanks, man."

"None of this thanks stuff. I'd gladly do it for you anytime." Roman rubbed his hands on his thigh. "So listen. I was wondering what do you think of Tyler Breeze?"

Dean stiffened. Did Roman have a thing for Tyler? "Oh… Why?"

"Well, he asked me out and I wanted to know what you think about him."

"I don't know him that well to be honest, Roman. He seems decent. What do you think?"

Roman's eyes never left his. "I think he's not my type."

"And what is your type?"

His best friend merely stared at him.

Dean wondered what was going through the grey eyed teenager's head. "Surely, you have a type. Everyone has a type."

"I don't know. I never really thought about it."

"Oh? Not even a crush on someone?"

"No one who's captured my attention so far. Well at least not recently."

"So there is someone."

"Mmmm… but he'd never want me."

"Roman, I'm only going to say this once. Any guy who turns you down is crazy."

Roman seemed to brighten up. "Really?"

"Yeah."

"You really believe this?"

"I do." They sat in silence for a bit. Dean sipped his orange juice and wondered who the lucky guy was. He meant what he had told Roman. Never meant anything more in his life. Tough luck for him too; Roman would never want him. "So you planning to confess to this guy?"

Roman looked thoughtful. "When the time is right, I suppose." His best friend's watch beeped. "Damn it. I have to go back."

"Your mum's famous BBQ party today?" Roman's family usually held BBQ parties once a month to bond with family members. They always invited Dean despite knowing that he'd turn them down.

"The usual. You should come one of these days."

"We'll see."

He walked Roman to the front door, opening it wide for him. His best friend was about to head out when he stopped and turned around. "Dean?"

"Yeah, Roman?"

"We'll always be friends, right?"

"Right."

"You really believe that?"

"I do."

* * *

 **II.**

 _ **Four years later…**_

"Pain is the foundation of life."

Dean rolled his eyes as Chris Jericho, the bookie for Ultimate Cage Fighting counted the money in his hands before giving Dean a chunk. The auburn haired man counted his share before pocketing it.

Not bad for a day's work.

"Your next fight's tomorrow, kid," Jericho informed him. "At Westgate."

Westgate.

Home.

Dean hadn't been home since Roman and him had gone their separate ways. His best friend had started school at the local university there while he wanted to hit the road and just live life.

Roman.

Dean wondered how he was doing. The last time they spoke, his best friend was heading with his college friends to Miami for a vacation after finals freshman year.

He was about to fight some dude named Stardust.

The auburn haired man had won the fight only to get jumped on later by some goons who swung a 2x4 to his rib. The only thing they had managed to get was his phone.

His phone calls with Roman stopped from then on. Dean was terrible with computers so he never got around to emailing him either.

They were far apart but Dean still loved him, would always love him.

He was no romantic however. No. That was Roman. He knew that it wouldn't take long before his best friend found someone whom he would want to get serious with.

A huge sexual appetite, Dean slept about. Never had a serious relationship though. Wasn't cut out for it. He was sure of that; probably the only thing he was sure of.

"What time?" Dean asked as he unwrapped his hand.

"The usual."

Dean nodded, fully aware of what Jericho meant. "Well, see you tomorrow, man. I'll be driving down there now."

"Drive safe."

The cold air slapped him across his face as he stepped out of the warehouse and walked slowly to his old beat up Acura TL 3.2.

In the comfort of his car, he turned on the radio while waiting for the engine to warm up.

 _So much to believe in  
We were lost in time  
Everything I needed  
I feel in your eyes  
Always thought of keeping  
Your heart next to mine  
But now that seems so far away_  
 _Don't know how love could leave  
Without a trace  
Where do silent hearts go?  
_  
Where Does My Heart Beat Now. Celine Dion. Taking him back to a certain day he wished had turned out differently.

The same way he wished the last conversation with them had turned out differently too… wished he knew it would be the last time they talked.

Then he would have listened to his best friend and tagged along.

 _"Are you sure you can't come along? You can always meet us halfway."_

 _Dean sighed as he cradled the receiver between his head and shoulder as he tried to light the cigarette in his mouth. He struggled a few seconds, trying desperately to keep the flame steady._

 _"Can't," he finally replied as he exhaled the smoke. "I've got a couple of fights lined up."_

 _"Are you smoking?"_

 _How Roman always seemed to know what he was doing - despite not being anywhere remotely near him - will forever remain a mystery._

 _"No," he lied._

 _"Those things are bad for you."_

 _"You don't say."_

 _"Dean! If you keep on inhaling those cancer sticks, how are you going to fight?"_

 _"I fight perfectly fine. Stardust dude won't be different."_

 _"Stardust?" Roman repeated. "His name is Stardust?"_

 _"Yeah. I had a good chuckle hearing that. Until I remembered kicking his brother's ass too. Do you want to know what was his brother's name?"_

 _"Do I want to know this?"_

 _"Goldust."  
_  
 _"Gold… why? Was he obsessed with gold?"_

 _"Decked out in it from head to toe, painted on the skin as well. Anyways, fuck it. Are you all packed up?"_

 _"I am. I can't wait. Finals was tough. I managed to get through all my papers but it was tough." Roman laughed. "Now I can enjoy myself."_

 _"Good for you."_

 _"Still wish you were coming though."_

 _"Nah. I live and breathe underground fighting. Big money, Roman."_

 _"At the risk of sounding like a nag, the injuries you got from it-"_

 _"I know but I'm more experienced now, you know?"_

 _"How long more, Dean?"  
_  
 _That was always the question, wasn't it? How long more would Dean do this before his body slowly broke down? "I'm not sure, Roman. Maybe once I've settled down in an apartment of my own, have enough stashed away for future use … maybe then."_

 _"Maybe you can keep a room for me," Roman joked._

 _"Do you even need to ask?"  
_  
Dean did have a spare room in his current apartment at Longview, the next town after Westgate. He always hoped he'd find Roman one day.

* * *

The ride to Westgate took him six hours.

It was six in the morning when he reached the place he had left behind. Every street he passed by held nothing but bad memories for him. How his mother and him were viewed. How he was an outcast for the most part of his life.

He was thankful that he was able to get his mother an apartment of her own with the money he was raking in UCF. Who was laughing now?

Dean needed coffee though. A nice piping hot one and grilled cheese. Yeah. That'd be a nice treat before he got a room in a motel or something. The only place that'd be open in this town was Bill's, the local all day breakfast diner that usually quiet during hours like these.

He parked his car by the curb outside, making sure that it was locked properly. Sure crime rates were low in these parts of the town but still one always had to be careful.

The smell of pancakes and coffee greeted him when he stepped in. Maybe he'd skipped the grilled cheese. Stepping up to the counter, he stared at the menu board in front of him. Okay. The buttermilk pancakes with blackberries and black coffee; he was sure of it this time.

"Good morning- Dean?!"

His eyes flew immediately from the menu board to the man in front of him. Long black hair held back in a tight man bun, piercing grey eyes and those luscious lips that he dreamt of kissing almost every night. Time only made him look even more irresistible. "Roman?!"

"Dean!"

"Roman!"

"Dean!"

And Dean jumped over the counter, pulling his best friend into his arms - a rare thing for him to do - holding onto him for dear life. "Roman." A warm rush of feelings overcame him. This huge care bear was in his arms after so long.

His best friend smelt of coconuts, taking him back to high school.

Without thinking, Dean crashed his lips against the man who had held his heart for what seemed like forever to him.

Roman's lips were soft and pliant.

Roman's lips were also moving against his before Dean felt his body being reeled to press closer. This felt nice. This felt amazing. It was a far better feeling than-

Somehow Dean's mind chimed in that his best friend was kissing him back.

Roman was kissing him back!

He immediately broke the kiss. Roman's grey eyes were staring into his inquisitively. "Roman, I'm so sorry. I was just so excited to see you."

 _Liar_ , his conscience hit him back. _You know you wanted to_.

They held each other for a while before letting go reluctantly. Both men stared at one another, taking in the sight in front. "You look great, Dean," Roman gushed. "I mean I expected scars on your face…"

"Told you I'm more experienced… in fighting I mean."

"I thought I'd never see you again. I mean I tried to call you but all I got was the operator saying the number was no longer in use."

"Sorry, Roman. I have a lot to fill you in."

"Me too. We have a lot to catch up on. I clock out at eight. Can you wait for me?"

"Always."

To pass his time, Dean gave Roman his breakfast order and ate while he let the Samoan man work out the rest of his shift.

* * *

As Roman filled the coffee machine with beans, he turned to look back at his best friend who was eating his pancakes at the booth closest to the door.

Dean.

He really was here.

Roman used to wonder what happened to him. When his calls went straight to voicemail before being informed that the number was no longer in use, dread had filled him. What if Dean had died in one of his fights? What if he was stranded somewhere with no way back?

Or what if he hated him?

They never spoke about it but Dean never did get along with his college friends; never stayed long enough to hang out either. He probably resented those friends for taking up Roman's time. But time may have took them apart but it did not stopped Roman from loving Dean with all his heart.

The Samoan man always hoped that he would find Dean one day once he had saved up but life got in the way. So much had happened that he needed to let his best friend know.

And that kiss.

That kiss that shook him to his core; that he had been waiting for forever…

Did Dean feel the same way? Or was it really as he had said it was: him being excited?

Impatient, he requested from the outlet manager if he could leave early. Ron Killings or R Truth as he liked to be called, gave him the go ahead since it would be his day off today and tomorrow. Roman wasted no time and quickly left to get himself changed.

Dean was sipping his coffee when he came out of the gents, all dressed in a tight grey t-shirt and denim jeans. "Ready to go?" he asked.

"It's not even eight yet," Dean commented.

"I asked for an early leave."

"Umm sure."

"You want to head over to my room?"

Dean grinned devilishly. "Oh? We're going to skip the formalities and go straight to the sex? I don't mind. Never stopped me before."

Roman felt his mouth go dry. Then he wondered aloud, "You have a boyfriend?"

"Nope. With all the travelling that I do, I doubt I'll find someone."

"Oh." Maybe there was still a chance.

He usually took the public transport but since Dean had a car, Roman gave him instructions on where to go. They were near a run down building about five bus stops away from Bill's. "You live here?" Dean asked.

"Yeah. I rent a small room here. More like a small studio. It's not swanky or anything but it's home."

His heart pounded as they made their way up to the floor he was living in. Roman's home was located on the second floor at the far end. Dean's eyes were everywhere, probably trying to figure out how Roman had ended up here instead of a suite house with his friends.

"Welcome to my humble abode," he replied as he opened the door.

The house was a small one.

Roman's bedroom was divided by a sliding door. It was facing the small living room which had second hand furnishings namely the couch, coffee table and TV. The kitchenette and bathroom was at the far end.

He had only recently painted the place a fresh coat of warm beige and placed some flowers to cheer the place up.

"Roman?" Dean asked slowly. "This is where you live?"

"Yeah." He shut the door behind them and dropped his backpack to the floor. "I… Dean, there's so much I have to tell."

"Please do because you're making me worried here."

"At the start of my sophomore year, I received some devastating news: my family were killed in a car accident. They were actually driving to New York to look at some apartments there when this huge truck suddenly swerved against their car and…"

"Wait. Everyone died?"

"Just my parents and siblings."

Dean immediately pulled into his arms. "Roman, I'm so sorry."

"It's alright, babe. I slowly got over it." Babe? Oh no. He hoped Dean never noticed that.

"I know you did," the auburn haired man said. "Still doesn't make it any easier."

"It wasn't. I couldn't concentrate in college so I dropped out. To make matters worse, they left their money to my Uncle Afa."

"So you didn't get a penny?"

"No. He claimed that he needed it because he had to pay off some huge debt."

His best friend looked pissed. "Something sounds suspicious here, Roman. What about Tyler and all those other guys? Did no one helped you out?"

"Dean, everyone stopped calling eventually when I dropped out. So I threw myself into work and lived with Truth… my manager till I could afford to rent a small place of my own."

"That's a crappy life, Roman!"

He was never taken aback by Dean's words; the fighter usually never held himself back. "But it's mine, Dean."

"I blame myself for this. Had I known what you were going through-"

"Dean, it's okay."

"No, it's not. Fuck, Roman. I feel like an asshole."

"Dean, stop it. Sometimes things fall apart so that other things can fall into place. You're here now and that's all that matters, okay?" He had to get Dean to see how thankful he was now that he was back in Westgate. "I'm so happy to see you. Really. I am."

Dean sighed. "Still…"

"Look, why don't you take a shower? I'll make you something to drink and you can rest."

"Alright," Dean agreed grudgingly.

Filling the kettle with water, Roman took out a bottle water to sip as he reflected on this day. What a miracle to have Dean back.

Of course he would no doubt be leaving for the next town but it was good to see him again. He hoped that they would be able to stay in touch this time. Pouring hot water into the mug, Roman placed a tea bag in and steeped it.

The years after his family's passing really shook him. He begun to see people's true color. Truth was the only one who was kind to him. His colleagues were fine but Roman never saw them outside of work.

Sometimes he hung out with Truth and they'd catch a movie or supper. He had a few one night stands - nothing worth remembering - but that was it.

When Dean stepped out of the shower, he merely had the towel wrapped around his waist. He looked handsome. "Was the water okay?"

"Perfect," Dean replied.

"I made you tea. Hopefully it'll help you sleep."

"Roman?"

"Yeah?"

"What are you doing this afternoon? Like about three?"

"Nothing. Usually I just stay in. It's my day off today."

"Good. Because I was thinking we can hang out."

"Don't you have a show?"

"That's only later at night. So what do you say?"

"That'd be great, Dean. Maybe we can go to Denny's for old time's sake."

Dean grinned. "Was there any other options?"

* * *

Well they had to find other options, Dean decided when to both Roman's and his dismay, the place was closed for the day due to a company function.

"Crap," Dean muttered. "Now what?"

"How about old man Flair's diner?" Roman suggested. "It's usually empty at this hour and it's just a block away."

Well, he hadn't been there in ages and the waffles and sausages were fantastic. Plus it would give Roman and him the privacy they needed. "Alright. Old man Flair's it is."

As Dean sat down while Roman went to get them menus, he couldn't help but feel guilty again at the thought of what Roman had gone through while they were apart. Now that they had found each other after so long, there was no way he was letting him go again.

But with his job taking him all over the country, he couldn't start something with him either. It wouldn't be fair to his best friend after all life had thrown at him.

"No. _No_. I am done," he said to himself.

Apparently it was loud because Roman was staring at him with a confused look when he returned to their table. "Done with what?"

"Uh… nothing." Dean looked around the diner which had now changed a lot with beer bottles being displayed next to some liquor ones as well. "What the hell happened here?"

"Oh. Rick thought it'd be a good idea to jazz the place up a little."

"You call him Rick now?"

"I come here from time to time."

"I doubt you can pick anyone up here, Roman."

"You'd be surprised."

 _Not_ what he wanted to hear but what did he expect the man to live his life as? A priest? "Oh?"

"Yeah."

"It's a diner."

"Well, knowing Rick, you shouldn't be too surprised with the kind of people he attracts. It does get lonely and so far the ones that I've been with-"

"I'm hungry."

"Dean."

Something about the way Roman always said his name made him feel warm inside. "Yeah?"

"Are we going to keep pretending that that kiss earlier didn't happen?"

"Roman-"

"The same way we pretended that you didn't sang _Where Does My Heart Beat Now_ on the counter of this diner _drunk_ … after old man Flair let you get away with that JD you stole from your mum?"

"I did not-"

"You said you loved me at the end of the song too. I mean sure you told me the next morning that you couldn't remember what you did-"

Oh Dean remembered alright. The question was why was Roman bringing it up now? "I do remember," the fighter admitted quietly. "It came in bits and pieces but I remember. I don't know why you want to walk down memory lane now but-"

"Because you kissed me."

"I did. But then again, you kissed me back."

"Because I've been in love with you since high school. I know it sounds foolish but I always hoped I would find you after we lost contact-"

"You were in love with me?"

"Yeah. I still am. I tried to hint you because I was afraid of you turning me down outright. Then on that last night here after graduation - when you jumped on that counter and warbled-"

"I did not warble, Roman. I sang. I was a rock star."

Roman snorted before laughing hard. "Sure."

"I was!"

"Celine Dion is not a rock star, Dean."

"She could be." Confession time. Better to tell him than to leave him wondering. "I… I was in love with you too."

"Was?" Roman repeated. "Oh."

"Am. Still am. Will always be."

"All this time and we could have been boyfriends."

"We still can be… if you want. But considering my job-"

"I'll support you," his best friend said. "I'll wait for you. It's just that now that I know how you feel… Dean, I've lost you once. I can't lose you again."

Dean felt himself torn between wanting to continue living his life the way he wanted to and staying here with Roman.

"We don't have to figure everything out now," the beautiful raven haired man continued. "We can work out the details later. But I stand by what I said; I'll support you in your career, Dean. We can do this."

Dean stared into his eyes, drowning in those grey pool that seemed to be looking into his soul. No. He did not want to lose Roman again. And maybe they had to work harder due to his travelling but they were always good with communication and Dean wanted to give him the best life possible.

Starting with that spare room he had kept.

Reaching his hands across the table, he gently entangled his fingers with Roman's. "Okay." He leaned over the table and met Roman's lips halfway for a few pecks. "Now how about we order a banana split and I'll fill you in about the room I've kept for you?"

Roman raised his eyebrow. "Room?"

And Dean happily filled him in.

 _ **A/N Thank you for reading. I can be found on Tumblr as sabrina-blyton! :-)**_


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